So this week I have to say I cannot do it. ... Wordless Wednesday that is... I got stuff to say and I need advice or your thoughts... PLEASE... i'm inviting this... ok here is the deal.
Little miss A *pictured above* is a tough girl... she bonks or gets ouchies and wants a kiss better but she doesn't cry and she is tough, high pain tolerance must come from daddy... She cried like two big crys when we pierced her ears... anyway... that's not what I want your advice for.
Lately if we say no, or talk to her in a stern voice, saying that's naughty or whatever... telling her she has to eat a chicken nugget BEFORE she gets ice cream.. stuff like that.. she will cry and run over immediatly and want a "HU" = translation hug...
ok, so on one hand.. it's cute, I wouldn't want to miss a HUG for anything.. however If i'm hugging her better 35times a day (seriously... and i'm not mean all day she is just sensitive) then is this going to cause a problem later.. I feel like she kinda needs to toughen up... is that rude she is nearly two (2.5weeks away... OH DEAR don't remind me)
What do you think? do I just enjoy the hugs no worries or should I tell her that I can't hug her better when she is naughty or what???
Any advice is welcome, even if I don't agree with it. LOL
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11 Comments:
My son would do that but he'd want to get a kiss on the forehead. I got in the habit of making him say he was "Sow-wee" before I'd give him a kiss. He's 2.5 now and he doesn't want a kiss but looks at me and says "Sow-wee" after I tell him he's been bad. I also try to make him "think about what he's done" before he gets any kind of comforting. We have a small chat and explain what it was that he did wrong and then after he says sorry, he gets a kiss if he still needs one. He doesn't need one too much anymore, though. He used to cry after being scolded but I'd try to make him call down before giving a hug/kiss.
Maybe you could have a chat and a delay before immediately giving a hug. Not sure. I'm hoping other readers have advice for you, too. I'm still learning myself. :)
Jaycie
I don't really have any advice. My 4 year old is the same way and I'm not always sure what to do about it either.
Super cute picture though. :-) I played too.http://www.theocmama.com
Happy WW!
I'm definitely no expert but we have been using time outs with our daughter and after the time out she has to give us a kiss. It seems to be working and then there are no hard feelings after the time out cuz we kiss and it's better. Hope this helps!
-Sarah
Minnesota Mama's Must Haves
I agree with Jaycie having her say sorry first is a good idea. You don't want her thinking that if she does naughty stuff that's how she gets extra loves and attention, think of this example if she hit or bit another kid and you yelled at her and said "No, that's naughty" and she ran to you wanting a "HU", it would feel like a reward for what she did so if she has to wait a bit to get it and learns how to be sorry for her actions by apologizing then she gets her reward for good behavior. I know its tough at that age because they are still learning what is right and wrong and when you see your child sad you automatically want to love them and fix it but to be a good parent sometimes you have to put your feelings aside to teach them in the long run to be a nice person.
Children just want to please their parents. I think this is perfectly normal. Something she'll surely outgrow. BTW...she is beautiful!
Yeah what she ^ said. It was much better than what I had to add...which was nothing except she sure is cute!
Oh I know this routine. I have a 2 year old girl also. She has always been more sensitive than the boys. But once she started doing this - crying when getting into trouble -- I say Maddy wipe your face and say sorry. She does - stops crying and then we hug it out. I don't think you can give in a bit with this situation or she will know that she can get anything she wants. I know this is probably not the most popular opinion but Hey I have to live with her. Oh and I love my shiny new blog button over there!! It's so huge. I have got to shrink that baby down!
Thanks so much for adding it.
I go through this also. They are still learning I just try and guide her the right way. Hugs are something you can't pass up.
I wondered the same thing about a time out and if my daughter would understand-she is not two yet but she does understand as long as she is there for only 1 minute. They have been very effective.
sorry no advice from me... but I love that picture!!! best of luck... keep us updated!
I'm so bad I have boys so I'm always saying come on you need to be tough. Yup I'm that mom ... LOL
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